The Other Lake Geneva
When Viktor Frankl wrote Man’s Search For Meaning I doubt he had an inkling that so many of us would find our sense of meaning and purpose in online communities and friend groups. Specifically, the group chat. I lucked out and have maintained a few close friendships from my days at Biola University. As we age, our chat becomes more political, more about parenting, more about the ebb and flow of careers, and most often about perimenopause. Scattered around the world, literally, this group has been a rock to me in times of turmoil–deaths in the family, deconstruction and reconstruction of our faith, the list goes on and on. Over the years, we’ve tried to get together in person: a timeshare in Vancouver that turned out to be in Victoria (I know, I know), a condo in Palm Springs, an Airbnb in Chicago, and this past summer a giant house in Lake Geneva, Wisconsin.
You might be wondering about this choice. Considering the timing of the trip, we wanted to avoid the chaos and cost of being anywhere near a World Cup host site. We also wanted to balance distance and cost for everyone who could swing the trip. Wisconsin was the answer.
Typically, I’m hardcore into trip spreadsheets, but this time (blame the war) I relied heavily on the planning skills of both Rose and Tina. I’ve known these women since I was twelve. That’s right. We met in Hong Kong at a youth group event and survived chunky hoops, utility cargo pants (why are these back!?!), and embarrassing hairstyles. Hence this is a real friendship. Sadly, a few others from the group chat were unable to attend but we figured since we are all turning 45 this year, we should recognize this milestone with more than free dessert at Applebees.
Besides booking a spot with enough beds so we could all snore in private, we made a document with all the random topics we wanted to discuss (creatine supplements only go so far to enhance memory). We also brought little gifts from our respective hometowns (camel milk lip balm & crocheted wine glass lanyard from Abu Dhabi).
What is there to do in Lake Geneva you might ask? This really isn’t a place you go to “do” things. It’s more like you go to experience Midwest charm, scavenge thrift stores or antique shops, and ponder how rich people can afford to maintain their mansions on the lake. If you’re bringing a family, there are lovely lakeside beaches, quaint ice cream shops, free concerts in the park, a central public library with daily events, and a weekly farmer's market.
A few highlights
Geneva Lake. At this travel age, I’ve come around to paying for tours that contextualize people and geography. Our boat tour was gorgeous, fascinating for what it revealed about Lake Geneva as a hub of intergenerational wealth. Our 19-year-old guide casually pointed out estates belonging to US Steel and Val-Lo-Will Chicken Farms families like it was no big deal. For some light reading, check out “Visiting the Wisconsin Hot Spot for Millionaires and Mobsters”. I still can’t get over just how much wealth is concentrated among so few families.
Dungeons and Dragons. Gary Gygax co-creator of the famous collaborative game is originally from Lake Geneva and if you really want to (we didn’t), you can go tour his house.
Scoops. Look, I’m not an ice cream person but Rose insisted this was worth the stop and it did not disappoint.
Strong Drinks and Baked Goods. The Porch. Inspired Coffee. Boxed and Burlap. I’m not sure what the coffee shop-to-population ratio is, but there seemed to be one on every corner and at least half were Christian or religiously affiliated, which felt very Midwest. I had my first babka experience and I’m a convert. For a non-coffee detour, Topsy Turvey Brewery gave us a much-needed break from the heat, refreshing seltzers, and a place to catch some World Cup matches.
Breakfast(s) of Champions. We spent most mornings catching up on life events and chismis about old acquaintances over fruit and yogurt bowls. However, we ventured out a few times and found these gems. Great Eggs smells like bacon grease (in a good way) and you’d better be ready with your order when you step up to the counter. Jaime’s Cafe in nearby Delevan offered all the usual favorites but leveled up with a tres leches option for pancakes, waffles, and crepes. Worth it.
Dusty Treasures. No vacation town is complete without numerous second hand stores interspersed with higher end antique shops. As the saying goes: “one woman’s discard pile is another woman’s impulse buy”. I’m not going to admit how long we sifted through the wares at Geneva Upscale Consignment. We tried to peruse 9 Lives Boutique but as a volunteer run shop, we were hard pressed to find a day it was opened but love shopping for a cause.
Side Quest: Delevan. We stopped for breakfast and discovered Delevan’s history as a winter home for American Circus acts. Apparently, as many as 26 circus caravans were based there at one time. I was also unaware of the strong circus culture Wisconsin is apparently known for. Next time we’ll head to Baraboo for a tour of the Ringling Brothers Museum.
Honorable Mention: Wildlife. Even coming from the Pacific Northwest where wildlife wanders across the street even in the suburbs, I was surprised to find a couple bucks (antlers and all) wandering the thicket behind our rental. I learned that I can’t distinguish between squirrel furry animals: Is that a marmot, a groundhog or a muskrat? Thankfully, a friend on Bluesky identified this little guy as a groundhog. Gary the groundhog joined us most mornings.
All in all, Lake Geneva was the perfect backdrop for a lowkey gathering, and I can see why families pile into the car for a summer getaway. The town is, unsurprisingly, very white, though we saw Black and Brown families enjoying themselves amid the American-flag-heavy scenery. Prices felt West Coast-level expensive, which makes sense for this tourist destination. Gas is surprisingly “cheap”and you can stock your Airbnb with essentials from Trader Joes or Aldi’s depending on your bougieness level.
While Viktor Frankl lived and wrote in a time without the Messenger, Discord or Whatsapp, he captured humanity’s desire for purpose. I’m not saying a lake vacay will solve all your career problems or end human suffering. What I am saying is that human’s hunger for authentic connections. Caring for others in our community, laughing over dinner, and creating meaning in seemingly insignificant details of the day is a way to make this earth a little less lonely.
This trip reminded me that we need to be intentional about carving out time for the people you love, be it family or old friends. As life happens, it’s easy to deprioritize our most cherished friendships in the name of schedules, work constraints, or chauffeuring kids around. While online socials cultivate real time connections and meme-sending is a love language, the in-person hang is priceless. So, check your calendars and schedule that trip. Then let the type-As or project managers of the group start that spreadsheet.
